gee - eez

it is currently 11:47 and i have decided to blog again .. caus there's so many things in my head and i'd rather there not be .

my family is so not what i thought it was . on the surface you see my parents trying to support there children and my brother working hard and me at school .

look deeper, and you'll see so many complications . my parents have a crap relationship, i'd personally rather them be seperated but hey, my dad lost his job a few weeks ago , my brother's been hit with all these problems and he isn't coping, and by not coping, he has turned to fucken gay ways to deal with whatever his shit is. and i am here lying 85% of the time about what i do.

how shit is that . like honestly . i know people have more intense and serious problems than this but COMMON . i think thats why i have problems with expressing my e-fucking-motions

. the two good things in my life have turned into the one good thing in my life . my boyfriend. i love him and even though we fight, i know he loves me with all his heart, as i do for him

like gee - eez i'm feeling down and news of my baby love having relationship problems isn't helping. And drifting away from friends isn't helping either, but wait, thats my fault too . I don't make enough time and effort to go out with them anymore. Even if they aren't allowed or are too busy , it's the thought that counts right ? ..

i think it's time to prioritise my goals . LOL . fucken CAFS right here severely !

my immediate goals:
- study HARD
- make a BIG effort for friends in my life
- try to stop lying to my parents about little things ( i can't exactly say that i have a fucking boyfriend )
- be a happy kid (:
- don't sweat the small stuff
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my long term goals:
-love my boyfriend forever (:

HAHA thats all i could think of . =.=

so ANYWAY . i'm off . i feel better now . i love my mum too . she's one strong woman that one (:
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